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Saturday, April 30, 2011

Royal Organ Playing at the Royal Ball!.....Royally Screwed!

Two divided by nothing!

Kate Middleton and Prince William shared their first kiss as a married couple a few days ago!

The new Duke and Duchess of Cambridge took their positions on the Buckingham Palace balcony for their smooch, along with Middleton’s family and Queen Elizabeth II.

Prince William first planted a quick peck on Middleton, and then went back for a longer second liplock after he heard the crowd chanting “Give her another kiss!” He did, which led the fans below to erupt in cheers. How chweet! How cute etc etc……A British wedding to cheer everyone up when almost all of the rest of the world is falling apart!

In India quite a few were swooning over the  Royal Band, Baaja ,Baraat they hardly even knew!
Is it and inspired new age fairy tale or a shot of Viagra on a flaccid dead world economy? Was this the true meaning of Getting “royally screwed” or just another Global Urban wedding?
It was surely not the typical royal wedding where it used to mandatory for  the prince and the princess  to be virgins,untouched, and hymen intact!!! Protocols of hierarchy we know are truly depressing and surely this one sounds absurd and ancient.

Yes this was more like the IPL matches….glitz glamour…maybe even gooey with a touch of royalty to capture so many hearts, but mostly eyeballs across  the globe.The prince and princess’s wild partying days maybe over….or is it?This seemed more like an event managed vow… or a verdict?....almost “made to broadcast”..;-)

Hope this marriage does not self destruct due to all the “royal” interferences and the previous princesses being the archetypal dumbos! Hope this one doesn’t end up being a sperm bandit  who robs to produce an heir to the throne…after all she is a commoner! Hope she always remember the three magic words: "You're right dear" or at least the true meaning of the word getting “royally screwed”

Somehow I feel the princess would end up being a mouse…err  a house on fire!...its all about coping! Or is it?

Heard the toast raised at the  royal banquet?.........To our wives and girlfriends……may they never meet!;-)

Wednesday, April 20, 2011


Adversity has introduced me to myself!

Always see yourself as being larger than the problem!

The challenge and charm of life is lost, if problems did not exist…yet most of us complain! Suddenly we understand the meaning of words like compassionate,mature and sensitive. We embark on a path to understanding the truth.Gratitude to adversity.

Suddenly we develop the thirst to understand.
The thirst to seek and find.
We suddenly surrender to a greater reality.
Suddenly we experience an empty mind.

Had life been only a bed of roses, the mind would  have not developed  to any higher levels of awareness or  ability to understand reality.Complicated situations and people always allow us an opportunity to develop the various faculties of our brain.As it is, we hardly utilise even one tenth  of the actual potential of the human brain! Always remember it’s the dark shades that make light really bright.As long as we keep getting born, it’s ok to die sometimes.Adversity gives birth to a new you.

Sometimes the destructive power of the mind ends up being more empowering!

Problems somehow allow the constructive capacity of the mind to be overshadowed.Remember what took you ages to build takes just moments to destroy.

When we struggle our efforts allow our minds a specific objective with direction.A new positive force - “concentration” engulfs the mind. It empowers us to continue the  mysterious journey called life.  

It’s from dirt the beautiful lotus emerges.
The scorching heat allows the shower of relief.
From numerous problems emerges concentration.
Problems  are inevitable but suffering is optional.
Its only from the depth of pain…. emerges JOY.

I’m damaged and I’m dangerous for I know I surely can survive!;-)
Try spelling EVIL backwards!;-)

Friday, April 15, 2011

Kill Bill vs Will Bill…..

Is it wrong to tar all politicians with one brush dipped in public angst against corruption?

There are some upright politicians who might seem like beacons for the future.I think we surely have some ideas mixed up here….instead of lookin at politicians elected by a democratic process in order to enable and ensure good governance and set high public standards like transparency empathy and diligence, it’s the vain glory that is reflected.Armed security guards,escorts,red lights flashing imperilously on their cars are all we see.They are elected onto a byzantine empire the foundations of which most often are black money and corruption.They take bribes and demand favours in return as perks for post.

It takes two to tango.The giver of a bribe and the taker are equally corrupt.Maybe its our way of getting around a system that denies us fair opportunities but please remember each time we pay a bribe we break the system a little more!Despite moaning about corruption we don’t hesitate to vote the same representative back to power!Many politicians are endorsing the anti corruption movement forgetting that they themselves are involved in scams and frauds.

My problem is  not only with the politicians but with some Toms and Dicks ,Janes and Marys who have leapt onto the Hazare platform!Swamijis,Sants,NGO’s and so called social activists who may wax eloquently on morality and corruption but whose personal ethics are on the wane.For some  in fact totally eclipsed!;-)

 I am of the firm belief that a cause is known by the company it keeps!..Especially in case of the Lokpal Bill. In any struggle its imperative that transparency and vigil are maintained.One must slash friends as strongly as foes.This movement is beginning to seem  like  a bandwagon where deadweight may destabilise the move even before it takes off!

Hope global power has not begun to flow from the barrels of a new medium called Facebook! Websites and pages are cropping up by the minute! If you want to know the theory and methods of revolution,you must take part in revolution. All ideas originate in direct experience.No revolution is just a Pani puri party! Not even in a white kurta/kurti! Not to forget the crowning Topi!

In the words of the Mahathma himself “You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean¸ if a few drops of the ocean are dirty¸ the ocean does not become dirty

We maybe rid of politicians though but find ourselves in deeper trouble!

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Enough is Enough!....

Some people are going to leave a mark on this world...I'll probably leave a stain!;-)

There comes a time in your life when you finally get it... When in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks, and you hear a voice inside your head  that cries out---- ENOUGH!

Enough screaming, fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes you begin to look at the world from a new prospective. This is your Awakening!

It is time to stop hoping and waiting for something, or someone, to change or for happiness to come galloping over the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that there aren't always fairytale endings and that any guarantee of the common situation "happily ever after" must begin with you! Who knows it may even end with you!

Then a sense of serenity is born of Acceptance!

Your way through the "reality of today" rather than holding out for the "promise of tomorrow." You realize that much of who you are, and the way you navigate through life is, in great part, a result of all the social conditioning you've received over the course of a lifetime. And you begin to sift through all the nonsense you were told,how you should look,how much you should weigh,what you should wear,how you should behave,why one must be Fidel,the importance of family and what you must do for them etc etc…the list is endless.

Slowly you begin to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really believe in. And you begin to discard the doctrines you have outgrown, or should never have practiced to begin with.

You accept the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are... and that's OK... they are entitled to their own views and opinions.  You come to terms with the fact that you may not be a perfect human being. So you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head or combating over how you compare.

Then you take a long look at yourself in the mirror and you make a promise to give yourself the same unconditional love and support you give so freely to others.

Then a sense of confidence is born of Self-approval.

Please stop maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer" hungry human,merely obtaining and accumulating... Please discover that  the joy and abundance you seek, grows out of the giving, creating & contributing rather than obtaining &  accumulating.There comes a time in your life when you finally get it!!!... and you hear a voice inside your head  that cries out-----ENOUGH

Sunday, April 10, 2011

James Bond is Not the only one with a license to KILL!...

A pilot and a dog make an “ideal”cockpit crew!!…the pilot is there to feed the dog, and the dog is there to bite the pilot in case he tries to touch anything!!...Especially if he/she has procured a flying license from one of the so called  "Baptized by Corruption" flying schools!!!

Today after a series of exposes and news flashed in the papers, most passengers get into flights,settle down in  their seats with tension writ large on their faces! For some it maybe their maiden flight!,whereas for many they know the routines like the back of their hands.

Suddenly hear an announcement…"Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants."…Air passengers  by now  are used to the plastic smiles of airhostesses as they explain protocols,do dwaar aage and do dwaar piche(emergency exits)… and the baritones of captains who welcome you aboard  whilst marvelling at the temperatures outside and the crusing altitudes!...of course the  immense gratitude for having chosen to fly with their airlines inspite of the numerous choices passengers had!  What they surely didn’t literally mean earlier however was… “We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride."

After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number so and so….The weather ahead looks good and, therefore, we should have a smooth and comfortable flight. Now sit back and relax....

OH, MY GOD!...he suddenly screamed…! Silence followed, and after a few minutes, the captain came back an announced " Friends, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier. While I was talking to you, the air hostess accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee on my lap. You should see the front of my pants!"

 A passenger beside me yelled, "That's nothing. You should see the back of mine."

Today there are a new breed of fake pilots on the  loose in cockpits! It maybe their “maiden” flight!...Goodness! heard of the word “home grown terror” but have never been so close to experiencing it!

Just think of our Driving license and how tedious the procedure is of getting it was! Of course greasing of palms surely happens in some cases ,but atleast one stands a chance of crawling out of a car!

 No wonder there are propellers in aircrafts… to cool their new breed captains…because the first timer fake pilot is sweating!...goodness me I’m an atheist!...Who do I call out in case im flying on such a privileged carrier?...err God?...somehow feel closer to him whilst flying I guess! The recent scam of fake flying licenses seems like surely a license to kill!

Remember that there maybe 50 odd ways of leaving a lover but just four routes to an aircraft exit!...the only thing I could do was just to buckle my seat belt tighter!

Just then I heard an announcement on a less than perfect landing… "We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal." Never earlier have I heeded so much to the announcement which warned me to be sure to take all of my belongings. If I was going to leave anything, to make sure it's something they would like to have… maybe even my LIFE!!!

Log on or Lagaan?...From the land of Calmsutra to the land of Scamasutra!!!...have seen it all…Just a click away!

I have seen that a movement against corruption has elicited a surprisingly huge response as never before!The response no doubt has taken many by surprise,coming as it were after a series of scams and mishandling of various governance issues.

Yes,the government gave in conceeding to the demands of the Anna Hazare movement.Ahh… finally the opportunity to the common man to expose corruption in high places.The outcome which took shape due to the support of the media and social networking sites was something no one thought possible just a week ago.

Some feel the Janlokpal Bill threatens the very fabric of democracy whereas others feel it’s the panacea for all existing ills!In my opinion however,  it’s a lot to do with byte off more than we could chew!Many agitators may start demanding new submissions by the government as this move has surely set a precedent for pressure groups every now and then!....One click of a mouse is a lot of what is required!

I am of the firm opinion that the Janlokpal Bill surely must have teeth!...Obviously I subscribe to that (happen to be a Dental Surgeon) and the power to investigate and prosecute.Corruption is surely a complex issue and needs a lot more awareness or else the teeth may end up biting off more than one can chew!The main purpose is to bring in accountability in governance but would this bill alone be able to accomplish this?

Are the people ready to investigate,prosecute and pass a judgement all in one?How does one handle a frivolous complaint?...We are dealing with humans I assume and man is indeed a mystery on its own with all his imperfections in place! Would this be the advent of a new Monster?Would this signal the end of representative democracy? The beginning of direct  democracy maybe….One click of a mouse is all it takes!

Yes what Annaji has exhibited  was awe inspiring. Urban Indians who barely come out to vote, came out of their houses to take part in a mass movement.Support was just a click away!...maybe voting also should be a click away!.... Love the idea of a law with teeth…so long as we don’t byte off more than we can chew! It has almost become certain that  with money anyone can give the law the slip but with teeth?...maybe borrow the best from the government and the civil society! Will the Aam janata’s fight against corruption pay off?....excuse me did i say..“pay”off?....Aam?..lol..if you have bitten off more than you chew just keep chewing!....Please do share opinions…I’m just a click away!!!..;-)